Mission Statement Generator by Dilbert
Stumble It!If, like me, you think that Company Mission Statements are often not worth the fancy cards they are embossed on check out Dilbert's Automatic Mission Statement Generator. Unfortunately it looks like many of our major enterprises and public organizations used it already!
Heres 3 examples of the great work Dilbert's MSG automatically produces:
"We have committed to synergistically fashion high-quality products so that we may collaboratively provide access to inexpensive leadership skills in order to solve business problems"
"It is our job to continually foster world-class infrastructures as well as to quickly create principle-centered sources to meet our customer's needs"
"Our challenge is to assertively network economically sound methods of empowerment so that we may continually negotiate performance based infrastructures"
Strangely these look worryingly familiar so it would be fun to create a list of 3 real MS and jumble them up with the 3 MS generated by Dilbert above to see if anyone could actually tell the difference!
So dear reader I challenge you to send me the 3 most buzzword-loaded generically-meaningless genuine Mission Statements from real organizations you can find so we can do that experiment.
Try out Dilberts Mission Statement Generator yourself
Thanks To Peter Fryer for spotting this beauty!
About Ken Thompson
Ken Thompson is an expert practitioner in the area of bioteaming, swarming, virtual enterprise networks, virtual professional communities and virtual teams and has published two landmark books:
Bioteams: High Performance Teams Based on Nature's Best Designs
The Networked Enterprise: Competing for the future through Virtual Enterprise Networks
Ken writes the highly popular bioteams blog which has over 500 articles on all aspects of bioteams (aka organizational biomimicry) - in other words how human groups can learn from nature's best teams.
Ken is also founder of an exciting European technology company Swarmteams which provides unique patent-pending bioteaming technologies for all shapes and sizes of groups, social networks, business clusters, virtual/mobile communities and enterprises. Swarmteams enables groups to be more responsive and agile by fully integrating their mobile phones and the web with bioteam working techniques. The latest Swarmteams implementation is SwarmTribes which helps musicians and bands form a unique collaboration with their fans for mutual benefit.
Digg | 
del.icio.us | 
Reddit | 
Yahoo! | 
Add to my favourites
Comments
Bioteams Books Reviews
Mobile business applications framework
In a just published book Work Goes Mobile by Michael Lattanzi, Antti Korhonen and Vishy Gopalakrishnan, authors of Nokia’s mobility master plan, propose a very useful application profiling scheme to establish the degree to which a business could exploit mobile technologies in their broadest sense. This approach would also be very useful for establishing the support requirements for virtually networked teams.
Buy it now from:
Amazon.Com
Amazon.Co.UK
Related News & Media Articles
The web: the next 5000 days
Kevin Kelly gives a fascinating talk on TED on the next 5,000 days of the web arguing that it has currently about the same processing power as a single human brain. However over the next 30 years Kelly suggests it will rapidly grow to the power of 6 Billion human brains and exceed the total combined processing power of the human population.
The team brain concept
James Thornton in “You Have Three Brains” reports on research that we each have, not one but, three brains nested within our skulls – a lizard brain, a dog brain, and a human brain. This got me thinking – if teams are really living systems then they might have 3 brains too?
International standard for collaborative relationship management launched
The world’s first international standard for managing collaborative business relationships is to be developed by the British Standards Institution (BSI) in collaboration with PSL (a joint DTI and CBI 'not-for-profit' venture).
It will provide a framework for businesses to manage their internal and external relationships effectively within their supply chains.
Frank Post, Marketing Director of British Standards said,
